How to survive Monday… with demotivational posters



We don’t like Mondays apparently. I’m not sure what it is about Monday specifically that makes us dread getting up first thing, but personally I’ve always detested Tuesdays more. To me, Monday is organisation for the week day, a day dedicated to catching up on current events, checking my emails and writing my to-do list for the rest of the week. Mondays are easy.

Here’s some ways I find help me survive that first day of the week. I’m not saying this is good advice, or that it’s even been approved by registered medical experts, but it works for me and could help you too:

  • Set a 5 minute snooze alarm and use it to collect yourself for the day.

wake up

Ok, I am not a morning person at all. I get grumpy and hungry and in the winter months I walk around the house with the duvet wrapped around me, cats in tow. I dislike leaving the sweet caress of sleep, not because I dislike my job, but because I love my bed. I set my alarm 5 minutes before I need to get up and set a snooze for 5 minutes. In those 5 minutes, I gather my thoughts, figure out what I need to do and coax myself out of bed.

  • Do your stretches


When you arise, stretch. It makes you feel good and gets your body warmed up for the day. If you do yoga, do your yoga. If you don’t, look up some beginner stretches and poses and try them out, but really just some warm up stretches (similar to those one would do before working out) will do to get you more awake.

  • Pick your poison


I cannot survive without a cup of tea and breakfast. My house has a convenient layout; you have to walk through the kitchen to get to the bathroom, so on my way I put the kettle on and prep breakfast (I say prep, I mean pour muesli into a bowl). When I return from the bathroom, the kettle is boiled. There is nothing greater first thing in the morning than that first sip of tea. You know what I’m talking about, find yours and use it. For some it’s coffee, for others it’s orange juice, but whatever it is, allow yourself that luxury before hitting the commute.

  • Beat the commute 


The steps you’ve taken so far have prepared you for your commute, but now you have to face people. It’s going to take more than tea and stretches to deal with people, so get your headphones, make sure your phone is charged up and you’ve got your podcasts updated – the funnier the better. Laughing maniacally on public transport ensures that people won’t get in your personal space and puts you in a better mood for the day. As we all know, you don’t need a sense of humour to work * insert place of work here *, it certainly helps.

  • Get your game face on


You’ve reached the office. Now it’s time to get into gear. Next round of tea, followed by a celebratory cigarette/snack/whatever it is that you rely on to survive this crazy thing called life. I’m not here to give you mantras or half thought out advice that no one ever actually follows, I’m giving you reality. For me, it’s chewing gum and more tea. Once I’m at my desk, it’s headphones in, podcasts on and time to work. Write up your to-do list for the week, check your emails and deal with anything urgent. It’ll make you look good and you’ll feel better about facing the rest of the week.

  • Eat that frog… maybe


I actually do my best work coming up to lunchtime and at the end of the day, so more often than not I end up staying in the office later than my colleagues. You have to work when the inspiration hits you, or you will lose the good stuff. The old saying ‘eat that frog’ doesn’t always work. Sometimes that frog requires seasoning and prep. If your job is to eat a frog, why just cram it in there? Doing your job shouldn’t be compared to eating a frog; you should take pride in your work, no matter what it is. Make a meal of it. Serve that frog up with style, dammit!

  • Get a good lunch


Congratulations, you’ve made it to lunch! Now, eat well. Eat something that makes you happy. It’s Monday, so you deserve to eat something good, something tasty and filling. Not a soggy half frozen sandwich from the supermarket, no, you deserve better than that. You deserve warmth and deliciousness. I love comfort food such as soup or pizza. Pizza sounds good right about now, doesn’t it? Yes it does.

  • The afternoon slump requires hydration


Now, there are many, many health enthusiasts that claim simply by eating kale and drinking your body weight in green tea will stave off the afternoon slump. I have another method that is a little more enjoyable and that method is tea. If you’re a coffee person, that’s fine too. Sometimes the afternoon slump requires more, so my go-to is the cuppa soup, or chocolate digestives (just resist eating an entire pack, it won’t end well).

  • Patience is a virtue (that we all secretly despise)


Remember how you had to deal with people on your commute? You have to deal with them at work, too. Don’t worry though, you’ve survived so far and people tend to wait to bother you until Tuesday morning because they too are nursing hangovers and trying desperately to look alive and busy. Get them all eating out of the palm of your hands by offering to make a round of * insert choice of hot beverage here*. You will become a hero. Only do that once though, otherwise it will no longer be a treat, it will become expected and it’s just another thing to add to your Monday list that you don’t want or need.

  • The final countdown


The last hour is upon you! Sweet blessed freedom awaits! You have survived Monday. The last hour is usually the most difficult as most of us lose motivation at 4pm. In my job, I get to look at alot of stats. People are most active on social media at 4pm. It’s not a coincidence. The last hour is the hardest. All you have to do is make sure you are prepared for the rest of the week at this point. Check your emails again, reply to anything that requires a response. Make sure your to-do list is up to date and you’re ready for any ‘surprise’ meetings that may or may not occur tomorrow morning.

Whew! You’ve survived Monday! Now all you have to do is survive the rest of the week, so that the endless cycle may begin again and again and again and again. Now get back to work.

– Blog post by Jess Brown, marketing manager for Invicta Linux.

I work for Invicta Linux, Business specialists in Data, Security & Communications. 

Tel: 0330 2020 139 / 01304 450070

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